This Time Last Year
This time last year we were all busy settling into the new academic year for what seemed like the most crucial school year for Vidur, Mi. I am in a bit of a trance over how much water has flown under that bridge! After a hectic year that included mostly study, exams and prepping for entrance tests, interspersed with rather few and far between recreational stuff, I am a little freaked out over where we are, one year later.
I guess my psyche is finding it a bit hard to digest that Vidur will be studying away from home for 5 years, living on campus. As with any change this one will take time to get used to. I cannot even imagine home without his presence. I guess I’ll ease into that, thanks to technology that allows us to keep in touch in so many ways.
This time last year, we did not even dream that we would be where we are today. Granted that we knew college follows school, and it did, too. He did attend MES for a month before the IISER exams and results happened, after which it was a whirlwind of activity, fulfilling all the paperwork and other things that would facilitate his admission here.
This time last year, we did not even dwell on the possibility of Vidur living on campus. Now that it has happened, I am grateful that he’s slowly adjusting to the new life, albeit with a few hitches. We keep telling him not to sweat over the small stuff and focus on being happy, staying healthy and studying well. Yet life’s routine is so full of things one has to do to fend for oneself.
This time last year, Vidur didn’t even use a mobile phone and now it has become our lifeline because it connects us when we want.
This time last year, we had no idea Vidur would be sharing a room with a coursemate and half living out of a suitcase and worrying about laundry and adjusting to amenities he’s totally not used to and has to accept for the next five years.
I know that this time, next year, we’ll all probably be laughing thinking about this time last year, and feeling proud of where we are at the time. I keep telling Vidur that I am filled with admiration for the way he’s handling the change. So he’s a little nervous, but that is mainly because everything is so new. Familiarity breeds attempt, or so I told him. Often the fear of the unknown and the hesitation to tackle it is directly proportional to our level of self-confidence. As he takes each step forward, it will be a step in the direction of happiness and peace.
And thus I bless my son, your grandson, Mi. I rest assured that you’re watching over him and infusing him with courage. Yes, he wishes you were here to enjoy the beauty of the campus, naturally. As we marvel at the sight of peacocks roaming freely here in the wilderness, we recall that trip to Melukote years ago, and our tryst with the peacocks there. Makes me smile wistfully to remember how he believed that he taught the peacock to dance.
Sigh. Time flies.
The tears can wait until I return home because even though I know things are good, it feels like my heart is elsewhere feeling a bit lonely.