Yes, Mi. Most texts are lies and usually about sour grapes, although the sender will never admit it. Case in point, even people who claim to be friends mostly reserve the whining for yours truly, so much that I often wonder if I am a […]
Memories from another day . . .
Sometimes, no matter how much we love someone, it is hard to share things with them, Mi, simply because we know for sure what their reaction will be. And thus a lot of things are left unsaid. I mean, what a dilemma when caught between telling–because they definitely want to know, and not telling–because who wants to get caught in the tangle of their reactions? Yet, there are times I brave this and tell, rather than face the even murkier consequences of not telling. Ugh!
Same goes with sharing things in public, in today’s world ruled by social media updates that center around people feeling obliged to give anyone who is listening (or not) a blow by blow account of their day and their feelings.
So I had another birthday, you know. And I missed you most of all. I soothed myself, going through old photo albums. I comfortably sat myself on the floor, on a mat near the shelf housing our albums. I had a wonderful three hours, interrupted–nay–punctuated with a strong tumbler of kaapi, with which I toasted you constantly, for every sip.
Would you believe that there was not a single phone call to wish me this year? Not from friends, not from family. Of course I am not counting Sury and Vidur. Vidur has made it a tradition to gift me a poem at midnight, with greeting cards. So precious. And I hold that in my heart.
I nostalgically thought of those days when friends would swarm our place, arranging surprise parties. Make me bunk work. Spend the day in gastronomic stupor. Take bike rides around the area. Piles of gifts in jazzy gift wrapping. Sigh.
I am okay with none of the above. But what I am finding hard to get over is the lack of phone calls. WhatsApp and Facebook has taken over communication channels. I guessing that if there was no Facebook, there’d hardly be any happy birthday wishes since there’d be no timely reminder.
Also, these days, friends has a whole new meaning. People claim to be friends, but don’t feel the need to keep in touch. They will completely ignore you, then one fine day reconnect to assure themselves that the relationship is intact, then go back to being strangers. I guess it makes them feel better. And of course they will mention it publicly so whoever reads it gets the impression that these two are BFFs.
Ah well, we live and learn, eh? Moving with the times, I am grateful for social media. It is wonderful of people to make the effort to post that happy birthday wish.
I am also super-grateful for the handful of old friends who have not changed over the decades and continue to be the crazy loveable souls I fell in love with.
I did some random birthday shopping but my heart wasn’t entirely in it. Probably because I am focused on decluttering now and I think twenty times, perhaps more, before I acquire something. I smiled a lot, remembered the times when we used to be broke and you’d make idli – stick a tiny candle in it and tell me to pretend it was a birthday cake. For my part, I celebrated the event by sponsoring meals at the Seva Sadan.
I thank you for teaching me that making a difference in others’ lives is true celebration of our own lives.
Sigh. I think I sigh-ed twice too many times. I know that this too shall pass, but dayum! I miss those phone calls!
Or rather, not seeing things in my case, Mi. Did I tell you about my new specs story? Well, not that I really had problems with the existing pair, but you know how it is…have to do the routine annual full eye exam thanks to the diabetes. So off I went to Narayana Nethralaya one fine sunny morning to do it. Of course I forgot my card, but thanks to technology they found my registration based on my phone number. Yay for that. Imagine coming back home because of that little detail eh? If that had been the option I would have simply registered afresh, ha ha.
Unlike the specs shop where they check power with that machine, the hospital goes the whole hog like old times. Just like Dr. Allurkar. So first, eye-check with the lens, then the three rounds of dilation. It is amazing how the 20 minutes seem like hours, Mi. Eyes closed, head back without a backrest and going for the pain in the neck later…because even though I start off sitting straight, it seems only natural to tilt my head back with my eyes closed..probably because I have to do that to get the drops in. Sigh. An hour later, the doc sees me and I go through the ritual of various machines to check the eyes for glaucoma/cataract/what have you.
Finally, I got a clean bill–or as clean as it can get for me–which means no diabetes-related issues. I still can’t read with my right eye and still have short sight and long sight combined and yeah, so new glasses because of a change in the power.
What’s funny is, the old glasses are comfortable–but medicine knows best, eh? So I have to get a new pair which means close to 20K bye-bye. I sat on the prescription–no surprise there–for a couple of weeks before guilt drove me to the optician. And thus began the saga of my new specs. After two visits I couldn’t find an appropriate frame. Then I got tired of going there because they did not keep their commitment of ordering the new frames they said they would.
So I decided to look elsewhere. These days there are so many in our area. Just for fun I went to the one in the corner of ninth cross, and found them as irritating as ever. I had a list, so moved on to the next. Thought these guys were on 14th cross on Sampige road but half way there, changed my mind and thought, why not see the nearest ones first. Turned out they were right next door to the irritating guys. So funny–I had come back a full circle to the same point. Ah well, evening walk done, I thought.
Turned out to be a nice place, what with 50% off the lenses–I could go with that. And did you know, no counter across which one sees various frames. The shop was one big hall–with the walls lined with samples. Two sales people were around to help choose. Finally, managed to pick a frame…started with one budget and ended up with way more. These are lightweight–still getting used to them–and don’t change the shape of my skull like the old one. Also, no thingammajiggies on the nose. What a relief. Double also–they have a snap on pair of sunglass lenses that sit right over the specs. So cool no?
Mmm. I wish you were around. I was thinking of that time I got you those gold framed reading glasses. You laughed your head off because they were expensive. I still have them, Mi. Dunno what I’ll do with them…but you know. Sigh.
Was also amused thinking of those days during my childhood when we would walk home after the eye doctor visit, feeling practically blind.
Coffee time now, because memories taste best with coffee.