How crazy is it that I actually ended up making a Thiruvadarai-like kootu and kesari, Mi? I suppose some things just happen because they will and nothing we do can stop them. Bonus? So feel-good without conscious effort.

It happened so naturally. Here I was, thinking of that second coffee of the day and as I watched the milk heating, my mind ran over the contents of our fridge, trying to decide what to cook. So anyway I brought the whole veg tray out to take stock.

Unable to decide, I just chose 7 different vegetables and thought I’d cook them anyway and decide what to do later. So many possibilities, no? I kept the cooker with some rice, sprouts, dal and the veggies, grabbed my coffee and went back to work.

An hour later, I remembered it was pournami and decided to make kesari. I am smiling now to think of how seamlessly it all happened. Oh yes, it turned out great as always, and you know there’s no vanity there. I distributed to our immediate neighbors before I had lunch.

I ended up making a kootu with the veg since that seemed like the smartest one-dish meal, and mixed with a little dalia, and a spoon of ghee, I was transported half way to heaven. Too bad that Two and A Half Men had just ended when I turned on the TV. I explored other channels and came across one that was playing a movie called Spy. I watched that for 15 minutes and decided I really must watch the whole movie. Sadly I couldn’t afford to do that because of work deadlines, but one quick look in YouTube assured me that I could watch it at will. Yay yay!

Today is Bogi pandigai and I am just going to do some quick cleaning up around the house before I settle to work. I miss you the most during festivals. Vidur is looking forward to Lohri celebrations on campus, which means mainly dancing. I find it so sweet that he loves to dance and tries never to miss an occasion.

Some days I wonder where the years went. I mean, an adult son with a mind of his own. At the same time, I feel a nice warm glow at the way he’s turned out. Sounds stupid, but I really never imagined he’d be studying away from home. I guess I’ll always feel that twinge of pain over his absence, even though I know he’s in the best place, and that life is good.

Oh, I am infinitely grateful for everything. In fact, yesterday while making the offering of the prasadam at the altar, I shocked myself by bursting into tears. Not sad tears, but just that choky emotional feeling. My mind was flooded with memories of the excitement you used to feel about pournami day, the shopping, the flowers, arranging the tray with cups of prasadam to distribute, sitting and reading the slokas and story together and the teasing you good-naturedly put up with, from me. I practically heard your voice reading the story, you know.

Then when I left to bring Vidur back from school, you would pack prasadam to distribute to the teachers and the kids there. How appreciative Vidur was about everything we did–he is still like that, you know. Even yesterday, while talking to him, he said, “Mummy you’re a great cook” and reminisced about all the special dishes I made when he was home in December. Of course I will store that conversation in my heart and treasure it.

Okay, so let me get into the day. I have smiles to go before I sleep.