I know, Mi. Strange thing to talk about with you, but you, more than anyone will empathize over this. See, April (yup, your birthday month!) is peeking at me from around the corner and as I enthusiastically wave to it and beckon it over for coffee, I am also secretly thinking and making a mental list of all the things I have to do. This year, I am taking part in the A to Z Challenge – month-long blogging – with four blogs. So some planing is in order, eh? No flying by the shapely seat of my pants. No being a pantser, so to speak!

Thus, I am being wise – or trying to be – and have a solid too-much-to-do-list.

First on the list was setting the stage. Which means, for the blog, settling down to a theme. Now I already have a fab one, but with the two latest blogs I started, I have similar logos and themes because they are picture blogs. I suddenly got it into my head that I want to change the theme of one, because I kept getting mixed up.

And thus started the curse of the blogger.

You’d think that this would relate to people visiting, people commenting , people sharing what I wrote. Nope. That is never it for me.  My curse is the selection of the theme, largely due in part, to the choice available.

At least, speaking for myself, I can say this: if there’s one thing that excites me, disappoints me, makes me miserable and elated all at the same time, it is picking a theme for a blog. I mean, sometimes you find the perfect one right away – then it turns out to be not so perfect. Rather like thinking you really like someone at first sight and then closer contact proves you wrong.

Remember how I’d bug you about choosing what to wear and after wasting your time, go ahead and pick what I liked? It is the same with a theme. I have to feel comfy with it.

Actually, I am not at all hard to please when it comes to themes. I always look for minimalist, clean white background and theme options that are easy to customize without spending an infinite amount of time learning code that will probably break the blog. You know what they say about little knowledge being a dangerous thing.

Under the impression that I am a quick learner and quite intelligent at applying the knowledge I’ve gained, I tend to experiment with stuff quite a bit. I enjoy tinkering around – you know that – and have the courage to attempt risky stuff. And I am also used to hearing quite a few I-told-you-so’s in the process.

Luckily, just like Kittu uncle who loved to tinker with the family pendulum clock every Sunday and was in the habit of bagging it and taking it to the actual watch repair shop in our area on his way to work every Monday, I too have reliable sources and people to bail me out of the mess I get into.

Not that it will stop me from persisting in getting into said messes, because the joy of experimenting is like none other. Failure has never stopped me from going ahead and giving it another go, thanks to your constant encouragement. You have always motivates me to forge ahead and taught me never to give up easily.

Of course, there comes a point when even I realize the folly of wasting time on something and decide to let go. Nevertheless, I like to go the extra mile because at the end of the day I want the peaceful feeling that comes with knowing that I did not fail for want of trying. it helps me accept that some things are just not meant to be, and allows me to move on.

To the next thing.

Coming back to the blogger’s curse, the perfect blog theme, I always find it ironic how I finally end up with an absolutely minimalist theme that I prefer to pretty up with variable elements using widgets. So why stress over even trying scores of them and wasting valuable time better spent on more productive tasks?

It’s the blogger’s curse.

Curse because, once I’ve lost precious time, I feel guilty. I feel a bit tired.  Then I snap out of it. I go ahead and write that post that was just waiting to be written until I started browsing themes. I do not toy with the phrase “writer’s block“. I do not wallow in the  situation I created for myself. I move on.

Yeah. my blogger’s curse is harmless. And gets lifted with a good strong tumbler of coffee.